Free Dating Tips For Young Personals

We’ve long been told that women are more selective when it comes to the men they choose to date.

But what if at least a part of that selectivity is due simply to environmental factors and social norms — factors that could be easily manipulated? For instance, might approaching — rather than being approached — in a singles dating situation make individuals less selective?

Finkel & Eastwick (2009) set about to answer just that question with an experiment designed to test whether a potential partner’s “choosiness” was due in part to whether they were the ones doing the choosing or not. They corralled 350 college students into 15 speed singles dating events for their study. Participants went on 4 minute “speed dates” with approximately 12 opposite-sex individuals during each event. After each date, participants rated their romantic desire and romantic chemistry for that partner, as well as how much self-confidence they felt that had on that particular “date.”

The researchers found that the speed daters who approached their partners relative to those who stayed sitting would experience a greater online dating romantic desire and chemistry toward their partners, and were more likely to respond “Yes, I would see this person again” to their partners. In other words, the people who rotated from person to person were less selective than those sitting, regardless of which gender was doing the rotating.

When men rotated, women (the ones sitting) were more selective. But when women did the rotating, men (the ones sitting) were more selective. Nothing else changed in the experiment, so it was the act of doing the approaching (or being approached) that helped determine a person’s selectivity toward their partner.

The researchers noted,

Although Western civilization has become increasingly egalitarian over the past century, certain social institutions remain gendered, some in subtle, almost invisible, ways. The present research identified powerful consequences of a particularly subtle gender bias: the near-universal tendency to have men rotate and women sit at heterosexual speed-dating events.

“At first blush, this rotational scheme feels like an arbitrary, trivial solution to the logistical problem of ensuring that all of the women speed-date all of the men and vice versa. Executives from a popular speed online dating company confided in us that they have men rotate because (a) women often have more accessories with them at events (e.g., purses), (b) men never seem to mind rotating, and (c) it just seems more chivalrous that way.

“Speed-dating scholars have appropriately adopted many procedures from professional speed-dating companies, so it is not surprising that this gendered norm has largely persisted, even for events organized and hosted by scholars. The present results, however, present a cautionary note: Even subtle gender norms can have important consequences for romantic dynamics.

Indeed, when researchers adopt a procedure without controlling for it, they risk missing a component of what they study. In this case, researchers just assumed that since men rotate in real-life, they should do so in sexy girls speed-dating experiments. This may have skewed the results of past studies that used this speed-dating procedure, especially those that examined women’s “selectivity” — selectivity that may have been a result of the procedure itself, not the women.

Does this make nullify all previous research on women’s dating selectivity? The researchers draw mixed conclusions:

“What implications do the present findings have for the extensive literature demonstrating that women are more selective than men when choosing mates? On the one hand, this sex difference did not significantly reverse at events where women or sexy girls rotated, so on average there was at least an overall trend in the present data for men to experience greater romantic approach (i.e., to be less selective) than women.

“On the other hand, the gendered norm we manipulated in the present study is just one of a universe of possible norms that could in principle affect romantic attraction, and our participants almost certainly had a lifelong history of navigating such norms that no subtle laboratory manipulation could readily erase. Given that men are generally expected, if not required (as at professional speed-dating events), to approach in matchmaking romantic contexts, perhaps this factor alone could be sufficient to explain why women tend to be more selective than men. The present results are at least partially consistent with this possibility.”

At the end of the day, more research is now needed to determine how much more selective women may be than men in dating or matchmaking situations. The current research calls into question the design of much of the past research in this area, so the answer has suddenly become a lot less clear.

For more celebrity local dating news click here
source::livescience.com

Fed up with speed dating,  dating, and all the other newly-contrived ways of meeting internet dating a mate?

Head to Europe’s biggest internet dating annual singles event — the Ireland Matchmaking Festival.

This isn’t any point-and-click matching; this is proper old-style matchmaking, done by Willie Daly, a fourth-generation matchmaking the country’s last remaining practitioner of the art.

“Willie has drawn on his extensive files, notebooks and ledgers, on his remarkable memory, and applied his highly attuned antennae to offer hope to the thousands single women who ply him with their details,” says the Matchmaking Festival’s Web site. (For those skeptical of one man’s ability to pair up so many, there’s also the tried-and-true pub dances and drinking until dawn.)

The 150-year-old festival – which this year has drawn some 40,000 romantic hopefuls (plus dozens of happy couples celebrating their anniversaries) — takes place in the southwest Ireland spa town of Lisdoonvarna, which calls itself the country’s matchmaking Cupid capital. Once upon a time, there was a matchmaker in every Irish town, but now 65-year-old Daly is the only one left.

September is the traditional peak month for matchmaking. It was then, when the harvest was safely in, that Irish bachelor farmers took a break from their work and hunted for single women wives. Matchmakers would take a cut of the women’s dowries when he made a successful match.

The hottest commodity at this year’s festival: Farmers, apparently because the love through free online dating services of the land is recession-proof.

“The farmers are back in vogue this year. The women place great value on the farming community and the likes of the building contractors would not be as popular free online dating services as other years,” Daly told the Irish Times.”A builder could build you 100 houses, but at the moment, who would want them? But you can’t make an acre, there is great security in the land. At times like this, it stands out.” (To watch a video of Daly, click here.)

And with a ratio of nine men to every woman at the festival, luck may well be a lady in Lisdoonvarna this month.

For more local dating information click here
source::tonic.com

It is a bizarre conceit of TV dating shows – and a slate of new ones is here – that the participants must act as if this brief televised interlude is their one and only chance for love. As in, “Antonio is my man seeking shot at happiness, and it’s my time,’’ as one buxom woman says on the premiere of VH1’s new “My Antonio.’’

Well, good luck to you, then. Antonio is “General Hospital’’ star and erstwhile underwear model Antonio Sabato Jr., and VH1 has assembled 13 women to vie for his heart in the usual TV ways: flirting, canoodling, climbing up tall hills at his command. The contestants on “My Antonio,’’ which premieres tomorrow night at 10, are no adult groups strangers to the catfight or the wonders of breast enhancement. “We have flotation devices!’’ one of the ladies coos as Sabato takes off his shirt, dives off a boat, and swims to the Hawaiian shore where they stand waiting for him.

VH1 has built an empire on dating shows that refuse to take themselves seriously; “My Antonio’’ is produced by Michael Hirschorn, the former VH1 executive who brought us “Flavor of free dating Love’’ and its many permutations. The broadcast networks, by contrast, seem more interested in dating shows as sociological pursuits.

ABC’s gimmicky “Dating in the Dark,’’ which airs Mondays at 9 p.m., purports to solve the age-old mystery of whether in free dating looks matter. Fox’s “More to Love,’’ on Tuesdays at 9 p.m., aims to show the world that large women need romance, too.

Even “My Antonio’’ is a study, of sorts, in the lengths people will go to draw attention to themselves; this isn’t just a parody of dating shows, it’s a parody of love. The women looking heave their heavy chests. Sabato’s mother appears in a sinister floppy hat to grill contestants on their prospects.

And before long, Sabato’s ex-wife has crashed the party, too, announcing she wants him back.

Sabato, meanwhile, can’t stop erupting into cheesy grins. You figure he’s in man seeking on the joke (he’s credited as a producer), but the show relies on the notion that he’s too far in love with himself to be anyone’s perfect catch.

He’s the guy in the bar who likes to sidle up to groups of women and purr, “Hey, ladies.’’ And if he weren’t so good looking, he’d get women looking Chardonnay – or maybe white Zinfandel – thrown in his face.

ABC’s “Dating in the Dark’’ wants to imagine a world where Sabato, heaven help him, would have to rely on his personality. Each week, the show sends three men and three free dating women into a pitch-black room (“the dark room’’) where they meet, break into pairs, and get to know each other better. Infrared cameras capture ghostly, black-and-white versions of the players, fumbling around for chairs and clumsily touching each other’s faces as they try to gauge compatibility.

For more matchmaking news click here

source::boston.com